New Friend

There’s an eight-year-old boy who lives next-door to me. He’s named Colbert, (after Stephen). We have spied each other many times but have never spoken. If I wave, he usually darts behind the trees or hides behind his dad’s car. I always feel guilty for activating his “Stranger Danger” alarm, so I had given up trying to be neighborly.

Today I was at the screen door in my kitchen, admiring my new bird-feeders, when Colbert popped up out of nowhere, like he was sprouted by the hosta.

He stood at the bottom of my steps and pointed up and down the length of the feeder pole and said, “That’s yours? I wish I had that! I’ve been watching! There were FIVE squirrels under there today! All at the same time! FIVE! And the chipmunks! And the birds! Do you know them?!!” Before I could open my mouth, he continued, “And look what they did! Did they do that?! They smashed the plants! Did they eat them?” (The hostas and weeds under the feeder have been completely flattened by the wildlife parade that comes by daily.)  As I answered his questions, a nuthatch flew onto one of the two feeders. I said, “The nuthatch is so silly, always hanging upside down.” Colbert pointed and said, “That’s a nuthatch?! I’ve never seen one before!” He was wide-eyed and excited.

We talked about the woodpecker who wakes us both up in the morning. Then the grackle came by, just as I was complaining, “Those purple-y birds are mean!” I told Colbert that I was trying different types of seed to see which the birds liked better. A dozen rapid-fire questions followed: what kind of seeds, which was in which feeder, who likes sunflower, what’s a safflower, which seed was winning? 

A chipmunk ran in between us. I said, “I bet he’s going to go right in my drainpipe!” And he did. Colbert was amazed. “How did you know?!” (Oh, how wonderful it is to have someone think you’re smart!) We waited for the chipmunk to come back out. He didn’t. I grabbed a handful of pistachio nuts I keep next to the bird seed and threw them out the kitchen door to see if I could entice the chipmunk. Colbert was highly amused by my nut-throwing. More questions: what kinds of nuts, who eats what, how many nuts, do birds eat nuts or just the chipmunks, etc etc. We talked about how squirrels are not picky and will eat anything. I said, “They would totally eat your birthday cake, even.” Colbert smiled at this, so I continued. “And crows too. And goats. Goats’ll eat anything.” Colbert said, “Yes! Even fabric!” I said, “My sister had a cat who used to eat sweaters! The cat would chew around the buttons.” Colbert smiled again. He smiled with his whole body. He listened with his whole body.

I stood in my doorway, not wanting the conversation to end. Now it was my turn to ask the questions. “Have you seen the bunny? He’s been by the mailbox and by the big bush in back. Have you seen him?” Colbert said, “Yes! I saw the bunny! It was the first time! I told my dad to come look, but he didn’t care.” A long pause, staring at his shoes, and then the whole body smile again. “Their ears are so big! They hear you all the time! If you get within 6 meters they take off.” I loved his use of the metric system.

The chipmunk came part-way out of the drainpipe and rubbed his paws together. Colbert said, “He’s getting them warmed up so he can crack that nut! Let’s give him some space.” As Colbert backed away, I said, “Bye! Nice talking to you!” He darted around the corner of his house and once out of view he called out, “Nice talking to you, too!”