Neighbor, again.


My neighbor needs to get a hobby.
I imagine her first move in the morning is to open her blinds and make sure my car is in still in my driveway.  I imagine her slurping her coffee while she keeps her eyes locked on my front door; she jumps up from the table when she sees me leave the house, but oh, relief! I am merely taking out the trash. As I prove to be boring today, by mid-afternoon, she takes her gaze off my property and unfortunately latches onto a new target of intrigue.          

A little girl, probably 7 or 8, lives on my street. She has one of those sit-on scooters. I live on a gentle hill, and for the past two days, all day long, that little girl rockets down the hill on her scooter. The wheels grind on the pavement, and it’s loud, but after a while it’s like a white noise machine. It’s no worse than countless other neighbors’ leaf blowers, or today’s ferocious wind. The little girl gets to the bottom of the hill and trudges back up to the top, carrying her scooter in the crook of her arm. She readies herself and goes down again. For an hour. Maybe two? Maybe six? Who knows. I stop hearing it. I watched her for a few minutes and thought she was very earnest and sweet. You can probably guess where this is going.

More texts from my neighbor: “Are you enjoying the noise?! We should petition for speed bumps!” An hour, later another text: “I just spoke to her and told her it was too dangerous. She could get hit by a car! It must have sunk in, because she’s gone back inside.”

The girl is not going to get hit by a car. I live on a jug-handle and nobody’s going anywhere! I am incensed that my neighbor wanted it quiet, got her way, and thinks she deserves a hero’s medal for saving a life.

The poor kid! All she wants to do is ride her scooter, and some batty lady is ruining what little fun is left in the world!

Peeking
Annoying
Neighbor
Driving me crazy
Every
Move
Inspected
Constantly

I could forgive much of my neighbor’s behavior of late, but this? Harassing a little girl on a scooter? She has crossed a line.

Comments

  1. LeslieApril 3, 2020 at 1:23 PM

    Ugh. People need to mind their own damn business. Altho I suppose she thought it *was* her business. Get everyone in the neighborhood to post signs in their windows that the kid can ride her scooter. IDK. You either ignore people like that or fight back. I say fight. It's not like she's your BFF or anything anyway.

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